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    26 September

    我那如梦般的幸福 之四 —— 等待

    是夜，一个人坐在电脑前
    不知所措的望着空荡荡的屏幕
    不知道自己想做些什么
    不知道自己在想些什么
    仿佛思想已经被抽走，只剩下了一个空壳
     
    等待，真的是一件很痛苦的事情
    尤其是当自己的心有了羁绊，有了牵挂
    想用其他的方式来麻醉自己
    但是却无法安心
    常人看来转瞬即逝的时间
    对于我来说仿佛每一秒都像过了一年
     
    也许我有一些偏执，有一些阴暗
    因为所有的事情，我都会只看到黑暗
    真的很害怕
    害怕就这样无尽的等待下去
    害怕得不到认同
    害怕失去现在的幸福
    害怕离开
     
    真的很奇怪，以前从来没有这样的感觉
    仿佛心口就像是被一只无形的手，紧紧地挤住
    无法思考
    无法呼吸
    全身的血液仿佛都停止了流动
    只剩下了孤寂与落寞的夜
     
    这就是爱
    会让人变得脆弱
    会让人变得敏感
    会让人喜怒无常
    会让人手足无措
     
    几个小时的时间
    心情却是如此的忐忑
    虽然坚信幸福不会就这样从身边溜走
    但是眼泪还是会不自觉地从眼角流下来
     
    只是因为期待认同与肯定
    只是因为害怕失去与伤害
    只是因为对寂寞与孤寂的恐惧
    只是因为等待
     
    等待着电话铃声的响起
    等待着听到她的声音和话语
    等待着看到她那美丽的笑脸
    等待着那个时刻的到来
    让我不再害怕，不再恐惧
    不会再在这静寂的夜晚
    让自己的泪水顺着脸颊流下来……
     
    00:29 | Blog it

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